This year, the roller-coaster

After building and tumbling, lurching through sharp turns and unexpected directions; after leaving the track, expecting the car to explode from the betrayal of gravity, I again plunge and begin to climb another hill.

Decided to walk to the theatre building to see "A Child's Christmas in Wales" last night. Was stopped on the way by a girl trying to get to the same place, so we joined up. We talked for hours after the show, exploring and sharing each other's views--philosophies, future plans, aesthetic approaches.

A new face. Again, I'm not sure exactly what to make of it . . . she's not a student, she's living in the area with extended family following studies in Minnesota. I can't begin to pierce what she makes of me, and I've decided nothing about her either . . .

Times are strange. My emotions rush and fill, translating into moments of despair, of triumph, of peace, of confusion. I am without short-term expectations, I exist, for the moment, seeming to misunderstand most of the simple systems surrounding me.

I know what I want, I know I don't know how to get it; I feel closer than ever to compelling conclusions, I feel the year beginning to close.